I forgot my underwear at the doctor's office....

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I was wearing a dress, so I didn't have to change into a robe for my lady doctor.  All I had to do was take off my underwear.  Maybe too much information, but now it's justified, maybe?  I find the situation quite humorous.

I didn't leave my underwear behind on purpose (obviously), but sometimes brain fog consumes you, especially when you also have an immense amount of pain just trying to survive in public.

Pain is a teacher.

You know how when you can't do something, you get around yourself to make it happen?  You'll overcompensate here or under compensate there.  You find "clever skills" you never knew you had.  It's the same effort with pain.  Except with pain, you learn very quickly that you can't get around yourself.  At least in my case, these last few months, I've felt stuck, literally.

I still can't dress myself 100%.  I still have trouble sitting down and standing up.  I still have to teach with my shoes on because my feet are painful.  I still have days of immense brain fog (hence leaving my own underwear behind).  But from where I was a few months ago to now, I have tears of immense gratitude.  

Healing is the most patient process I have ever experienced.  And let me be clear:  I fought the healing process for many years.  I did not make an active choice to surrender; my body did it for me.  Take note of those signs that ask you to slow down before a 2x4 figuratively plows you over.  I'm someone who likes to go, who likes to play outside, who doesn't want to stop seeing the world, who is always thinking of new ideas and jumping up and down about them.  Until I couldn't....

It's  quite interesting to me as we live in this world of instant gratification, we want to be healed NOW.  It's as if we planted a field of sunflowers and immediately after covering the seed with dirt, we were discouraged that the flower hadn't appeared.  Let's admit, we do it with many things nowadays: why doesn't this diet work, why doesn't this fitness routine work, why hasn't the world changed after protesting, why doesn't my skin look good after one use of a new product, etc, etc.  I know you can relate.

Healing has taught me to slow the F down. And I mean, WAAAYYYYYYY down. Cancelling trips. Sitting down to meditate more than once a day. Learning to 'DO" nothing. That is a huge pill to swallow. Usually I'll be "doing" nothing and within that space, I think of all the things I could be "doing". In the over stimulated world we live in today, it's exceptionally hard to not feel guilty or lazy or unaccomplished or even unsuccessful when you're sitting around because you know you need to.

All of this sitting around and quieting my mind has taught me that this is the only way to move forward. To heal. To drop myself and the low vibration "shoulds".

I use to think that the pause would only hold me back. Hinder me. Cause me to miss out. Lose momentum in my career. And now, I almost laugh and cry at the same time about that belief I held. No pain, no gain, right? No hard work, no accomplishments, right?

I feel as if I know myself better than ever.  And the most beautiful realization for me is, I'm only just beginning.  I feel that I've been able to nourish my career and really get clear about what it is I am doing and what no longer serves me.  And most importantly, I've revamped my personal boundaries so much so that I know where to spend my energy and where to hold it true to me.

Pain has taught me:

> Inconsistency is your friend and you get really good at riding the waves.

> You NEVER know what someone is going through.  I look seemingly "normal", but if you witnessed me trying to pick a pen up off the floor, you would either think I was expecting a baby or I was 99 years old. 

> My compassion has been fine tuned in a way I never thought existed.

> To trust myself.  There are so many approaches to lyme disease and diets and what is good for you and what isn't.  I've learned to tap into my body and feed it was it needs, even if it's not good for lyme.  Just as I teach in yoga, everyone is working with their own set of conditions.

> To feel.  That is no small gesture.

There's a great benefit to the pause.  And I knew this before my lyme disease kicked my ass (and my brain, and my feet and my knees - ha).  We all know this.  But it's like reading those quotes you see on brilliant cards or even on social media:  they resonate and they make sense and they might even inspire us.  Yet the day they apply to us is a whole new ballgame.

I work with a lot of people who are healing and I see and feel their resistance to the process.  I get it.  I really do.  Yet the surest way to begin the healing process is to surrender.  Surrender holds a lot of unknowns.  How freaking amazing is that?

Here's to the unknown.

If you're in a healing state, I see you and hear you.  It's a personal journey.

p.s.... use caution when searching for an image of lace underwear. 

 

How I Do, What I Do....

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So you want to know how I do, what I do?

I get messages all of the time, asking me questions, asking me to meet for coffee, asking me for the smallest piece of advice.  I don't say that in a stuck up manner.  I am grateful for all of you that reach out and I truly value curiosity.  However, I have strong boundaries with my time due to my health and my travel schedule.  I am also someone who wishes to empower you to find the answers in your own way, because believe me, the pay off is so much better when you take a look back and say "HELL YES, I created that".  Yet I do also believe in being supportive and supported.  We are all doing the best we can with what we have.  This I know. 

I am a self learner.  I love to learn things on my own and in my own time.  I will research the crap out of something until I know it left and right, up and down.  It actually lights me up to be such a researcher of my own life and career.  And I love to take risks because in my experience, that is the EXACT place where we find gain in what we are building and creating.  On top of that, risk provides us the opportunity to fail.  And if that scares you, then I'll be honest, maybe what you are thinking about doing, isn't for you.  Failing is part of the process.  Failing is needed.  Failing makes you stronger and provides some of the most profound lessons.  The most beautiful thing about "failing" (and I put that in quotes because, really, is it failing or is that our perspective?) is that we are always ok.  In fact, we grow stronger because of it all.

With all of this being said, YES, I am willing to help any of you.  Yet I offer it as a consult or program and the choice is yours, depending on your needs.

My career research and figuring out how to do what I do has cost me my time, my marriage, and my health.  Those things are valuable to me and above all, so is my own self worth and value.  This is why I am offering my tips, information, and leverage to you at a worthwhile experience and price.

I am always here for you.  And this is what it looks like:

WAIT -- you thought I was going to give you all of the answers, didn't you? 

If you have been to my workshops or retreats or know me well enough, you know that's not how I roll.  I am a teacher.  I want to empower you.  I want you to learn.  And if I gave you all of the answers, I can guarantee you might not follow through with it all.  Having the answers is boring.  However, I will give you tools and insights and ideas that are going to leverage what you want to bring to life! 

One hour (you can live anywhere, because we can skype or zoom or facetime):  $150

Three sessions (3 hours):  $395

What you get:

One hour with me to ask me anything you want.  Of course, there is a format, as I send you a list of questions prior to our session so we can maximize our time together.

We can talk:

Traveling and teaching // studio connections // building an audience // your community // thinking outside of the box // other ways to gain exposure// and more.....

If you are more interested in running retreats, we can talk:

Venues // site visits // pricing // marketing // before, during, and after a retreat // number of people // financials and behind the scenes // what to look for when creating a retreat // communication // whether or not to offer discounts // what NOT to do // what happens when someone cancels //  the single MOST important thing to do // social media // and more......

So what do you say?

The YES is what lights you up, what your soul craves, what you are meant to do.

Owning your shit is key.  Having a plan is imperative.  Knowing your WHY is like oxygen.

I'm happy to help.  Reach out via the connect tab.

 

xo




 

Get on purpose. Get off your problems.

You know that Harvard study?  I talk about it on my yoga retreats a lot... 

In 1979, Harvard MBA conducted a study on goal setting, asking the graduating class a single question about their goals in life. The question was this:

Have you set written goals and created a plan?

Prior to graduation, it was determined that:

  • 84% of the entire class had set no goals at all

  • 13% of the class had set written goals but had no concrete plans

  • 3% of the class had both written goals and concrete plans

The results?

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10 years later, the 13% of the class that had set written goals but had not created plans, were making twice as much money as the 84% of the class that had set no goals at all.

However, the apparent kicker is that the 3% of the class that had both written goals and a plan, were making ten times as much as the rest of the 97% of the class.

Putting a pen to paper is POTENT.

So my question for you is, WHAT DO YOU REALLY WANT?

Oh wait, let me be clear.  Let me clear that this isn't about the what the ego wants, it is about what your soul wants.  When you decipher the difference, you almost hear a "click" as if you just plugged into your own self.

We don't need to be or do anything remarkable or extraordinary (that's cue for: kick the self-inflicted pressure to the curb).  We just need to pay attention to ourselves.  Our alignment.  Our values.  Our heart.  What we truly want.

And make it very clear that what you want is what YOU want.  Not what your partner wants.  Not what society says you "should" want.  Not what your boss wants.  Not what your parents want.  You get my point.

The ego usually wants some sort of recognition or fame or money or big house.  I get it.  My "want" lists have included such things.  However, as I am [forced] to surrender (literally, I've been staring at the sky for weeks because I have no other choice with my health right now), I've been able to really note the difference between our ego and our hearts.  My ego has been screaming at me -- you're lazy!  It's time you get healthy!  Do something! 

I literally had to wave my white flag.  I fought my pain and my lyme disease symptoms for so long and now I've finally stopped fighting.  I've let them be.  Quit the resistance.  And I can slowly feel the healing and see the light.  Not so easy for a go-getter kind of girl.  To me, surrender was something to be avoided by anyone who has ambition.

Yet I've learned, surrender will eventually choose you, when you ignore all of the signs and symptoms.  I stuck my tongue out at it for a while, but now I am simply grateful that I am in this space for so many reasons.

I've come to admit that a lot of things I write down that I "want" are ego driven.  I had to really get clear and be silent and peel back the layers to what was REALLY underneath those things I wanted. 

Desiring my trainings and events to always be full is a great goal, but my heart translates it as this:  I desire to be a positive catalyst; a spark-plug for others.

Desiring more money (don't we all) was translated as:  I want more opportunities for leadership and creative expression.

Those are just a few examples, but can you see the shift?  I can actually FEEL the shift.  My goals now feel differently to me and I'm feeling inspired in such an authentic way!  With my inspiration, I'm able to carry out better concrete plans and stay disciplined.

Usually what the ego wants will come to you anyway as a bi-product of focusing on alignment centered goals.

I've realized that problems give meaning to a life without purpose.  What do you think?

You know, when we are in that space of making a big deal out of the fact that our dishwasher is broken, that he said this and she said that....

Sure those are very real things that involves personal emotions, but when you stay focused on your alignment, your purpose, you have a different focus.  In fact, you begin to see your entire world as a playground and every so-called problem is part of the game, where losing a job (for example) is no more serious than spilling your coffee.  Yea... chew on that one.

When you start making an effort to talk in alignment with what you truly value and want, it's way more fun.  Ideas flow from talking this way (and it also take mental discipline).  More connections grow out of talking about it, also.  Purpose.begins.to.show.up.  HELL YES!

When you get on your purpose, you get off your problems.

Are you in?

The action steps are simple:

>Take the time and space to breathe, listen and observe YOU.

>Write what comes up.

>Re-read what you wrote and start to dissect it. 

>Rewrite until you hear that "click".